Please, Don't Touch Anything

Below is a list of every ending in the game with timestamps for the video under the list.

Ending #1: Peaceful

1. Do nothing for 1 minute.
2. Continue to do nothing for an additional 3 minutes (“Egrophobia”)
3. Push reset.

Ending #2: Shutdown

1. Push the red button 20 times. (“Disobedience”, for pushing the red button for the first time)
2. Push reset.

Ending #3: Nuke

1. Push the red button.
2. A switch spawns underneath the red button, flip it.
3. Push the red button again.
4. Push reset.

Ending #4: Demon

1. Push the red button twice.
2. A panel with the roman numerals I, II and III will appear. Input code: 312213
3. A lever will spawn next to the roman numerals, flip it to the left.
4. A ten-digit keypad will spawn to right of the roman numerals. Input code: 8267
5. A 7x7 panel will spawn to left of red button. Highlight the squares to create a 5 point star as shown:

6. Push Reset.

Ending #5: Illuminati

1. Push the red button 16 times.
2. Grab the hammer from the left side of the desk and smash the screen.
3. Click the question mark on the screen.
4. Push reset. (“We are watching”)

Ending #6: Back to the Past

1. Push red button twice.
2. Input code: 312213 into the roman numeral panel.
3. Flip lever to the left.
4. Input code: 8008 into ten-digit pad.
5. A date panel with a left and right arrow will spawn on the bottom right of the desk. Push the left arrow.
6. Push reset.

Ending #7: Back to the Future

1. Repeat step 1-4 from Ending #6: Back to the Past
2. A date panel with a left and right arrow will appear on the bottom right of the desk. Push the right arrow.
3. Push reset.

Ending #8: Reverse

1. Push the red button 8 times to reveal the screwdriver on the right side of the desk.
2. Use the screwdriver on the square panel in the top right corner of the desk. Four colored buttons will be revealed. Input code: GRYB (Green, Red, Yellow, Blue)
3. Push reset.

Ending #9: Black Hole

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213 into the roman numeral panel.
2. Flip the lever to the left and input code: 8267 into the 10-digit panel.
3. Input code: 1244 into the four-digit panel at the bottom right corner of the desk.
4. Push reset.

Ending #10: Robot

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213 into the roman numeral panel.
2. Flip the lever to the right. A two button panel will appear and a UV light will appear in a small drawer on the bottom left of desk.
3. Pick up UV light and use it on the top left corner just outside of the screen. (“Who You Gonna Call”)
4. Input code: 0010110 into the 2-digit panel.
5. Push reset.

Ending #11: Alien

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Look at the panel with the note that says "Don't Do it!". Input code: Bottom Left, Top Left, Top Left, Bottom Left.
3. Push reset.

Ending #12: Meteor

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Flip the switch to the left and on the 10-digit keypad input code: 8267.
3. Input code: 3121 on the 4-digit panel in the bottom right corner.
4. A 3-button panel will spawn on the left corner of the desk. On this panel input code: 33211123 (1 – Left most button, 2 – Middle button, 3 – Right most button).
5. Push reset.

Ending #13: Cthulhu

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Flip the big switch to the left.
3. Push the red button 6 times for the screwdriver and use the screwdriver on the tiny panel on the lower right side of the screen (not the desk).
4. Push the small red button after opening that panel.
5. A screen will spawn to the left of this panel and requires a 9 number code. Input code: 011235813 into the 10-digit panel.
6. Push reset.

Ending #14: Green

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Look at the panel with the note that says "Don't Do it!". Input code: Top right, bottom right, bottom right, top right.
3. A 3-digit dial will spawn on right bottom corner of desk with a gray and red button. You need to push the gray button 276 times and then push the red button. For “The Fastest in the Wild West” you need to push that gray button 276 times within 1 minute. Push the little red button above the gray button after getting to 276.
4. Push reset.

Ending #15: City Boom

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Flip the switch to the left. Input code: 8008 into the 10-digit panel.
3. Push the red button 14 more times to reveal the hammer on the left side of the desk.
4. Use the hammer to open the middle right drawer of the desk.
5. Put the floppy disk into the slot underneath the panel with the dates and arrows.
6. Click the screen to begin the City Boom mini game.
7. To beat this mini game press to drop bombs on the city. You're given 3-4 bombs each round and need to make sure all the bombs are dropped to get the ending. To get “Red Baron” you need to make sure each of your bombs hits a building and destroy the whole city.
8. Push reset.

Ending #16: Blood Baby

1. Push the red button 16 times to get the hammer.
2. Push the red button with the hammer 3 times.
3. Hit the baby that appears and then hit the blood splatters (3 hits each). Hit the baby again to spawn more blood splatters to destroy and repeat one more time. There will be a streak of blood dripping down the table. If it reaches the reset button before you destroy the baby, you will be reset.
4. Destroy the baby and push reset.

Ending #17: Death Star

1. Push the red button 8 times to reveal the screwdriver. Use the screwdriver on the instructions poster on the wall to the right.
2. Push the red button 8 more times to reveal the hammer. Use the hammer on the clock on the left side of screen above the printer.
3. Click and drag the minute, second and hour hands of the clock to 12 o’ clock.
4. Grab the ticket from where the instructions poster use to be.
5. This ticket contains a randomized code. The red squares count as numbers, you need to read it from bottom to top and enter the numbers on the roman numeral number panel.
6. Push reset.

Ending #18: Happy Demon

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. On the four button panel to the left input code: Top right, bottom right, bottom right, top right.
3. Change the dials on the panel in the bottom right corner until it reads 666 by pressing the gray button. “Don't Be Distracted” will pop once you hit 277. When you get to 666 push the red button above the gray one.
4. A panel with many symbols will spawn. Push all of the symbols to turn them off, except: Bloody looking eye, Hour glass, A key pointing up, and the double wave.
5. Push reset. You will most likely also unlock “Button Maniac” at this point.

Ending #19: Eater of Worlds

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Push the red button 6 more times to get the screwdriver and use it on the panel on the upper right of the desk to reveal the four colored buttons. Input code: yellow, red, blue, blue.
3. Flip the switch to the left to access the 10-digit panel and input code: 8020. Then input code: 8267 into the 10-digital panel.
4. On the left side of desk input code: top right, bottom right, bottom right, top right.
5. Now look over at the 7x7 green button panel and highlight the buttons as shown in image:

6. Grab the diamond that spawned in and place it in the right hand slot of the golden panel. Push the button to the left of the diamond.
7. Push reset.

Ending #20: The Stanley Parable

1. Shutdown the system twice. Push the red button 20 times. Push reset and repeat.
2. The screen should now say "Awaiting Input" and a narrator will begin talking.
3. Push the red button. Many more red buttons will appear. Continue pushing them until the whole desk is filled up and you've pushed every red button.
4. Push reset.

Ending #21: Papers, Please

1. Pick up the stamp that's next to the printer.
2. Deny the passport.
3. Push Reset.

Ending #22: Ripped World

1. Push the red button. Next to the red button is an arrow.
2. There are invisible buttons that, when pressed, point in the direction of the next one. Keep pressing them until a 15 squared panel appears.
3. Push the buttons on the panel just 6 times as below in the photo (“3x5x6”):
4. Top line, last button | Bottom line, fourth button | Middle line, first button | Middle line, second button | Top line, second button | Top line, first button

5. Push reset.

Ending #23: Space Odyssey

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Flip the switch to the left to reveal the 10-digit panel.
3. Push the red button 6 more times to get the screwdriver. Use the screwdriver on the small panel in the upper right corner to reveal the 4 colored buttons.
4. Push the yellow button 4 times to reveal a key slot under the "Don't Do It" note on left side.
5. Input code: 2001 into the 10-digit panel and it will be replaced by 3 gold dials with letters on them.
6. Turn those gold dials until you spell the word EARTH: (E)-(AR)-(TH)
7. Push the button under the middle dial and it will reveal a key. Use the key in the slot under the "Don't Do It" note on left side.
8. Push reset.

Ending #24: Ocean

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Flip the switch to the right to reveal the 1-0 number panel. Input code: 1001000
3. Push Reset.

Ending #25: Is She Here?

1. Push red button 16 times to reveal the hammer.
2. Hit the clock in upper left corner of room with the hammer.
3. Click and drag the second, minute and hour hands to 6 o’ clock.
4. The screen will flash "Is She Here?". Wait 15 seconds before turning around to unlock “See No Evil”.
5. Push reset.

Ending #26: Toxic

1. Push the red button twice and input code: 312213.
2. Flip the switch to the left to show the 10-digit panel.
3. Push the red button 6 more times for screwdriver. Use the screwdriver to unscrew the tiny panel at the bottom right of the screen. Push the button that is there once the small panel is removed.
4. On the 10-digit panel input code: 553700078.
5. The locker behind you will open. Grab the gas mask. Turn back and push the red button once more.
6. Push reset.

Ending #27: Printer

1. Push the red button 16 times to get the hammer.
2. Hit the printer 37 times to unlock “PC Load Letter”.
3. Push reset.

Ending #28: Tidy Up
There are 10 pieces of trash (balled up paper) scattered around the room in the following locations: 1 under the desk, 1 by the filing cabinet, 6 right around the trashcan, 2 by the door.

To get this ending, simply get all 10 pieces of trash into the can. Make sure you listen to everything the guy says when he opens the door before resetting. I recommend increasing your look sensitivity to something faster than the starting sensitivity and comfortable for you to play with to throw the trash away in 15 seconds or less (“He’s on fire!”). The best method is to get the piece behind you first and then grab the 1 under the desk in the same motion. Focus on the 2 by the door and then finally grab the 6 around the trash can. Zooming in with actually slows your look sensitivity, even at the highest setting, so try your best not to use it too much.


Ending #29: Tic Tac Toe

1. Push the red button 16 times to reveal the hammer. Use the hammer to pull out the right-hand drawer with the phone.
2. Use the screwdriver to open the panel on the upper right hand of the desk to reveal the 4 colored buttons. Input code: red, yellow, yellow, blue.
3. Now we're going to dial some numbers to unlock some achievements.
   • Secret Numbers:
     • 411
     • 911
     • 867-5309 (“Jenny Don’t Change Your Number”)
     • 652-9770 (“Sausage King”)
     • 505-503-4455
     • 555-0100
     • 636-555-3226
     • 213-555-4679
     • 555-0123
     • 555-3455 (“Wardialing”)
4. Place the phone on the receiver and dial 311-399-2364.
5. Set players to 1 to lose at tic tac toe for “Losing Move".
6. To unlock the ending, redo steps 1-5, skipping the secret numbers and then set the players to 0.
7. Push reset.

Ending #30: Coffee
This ending can only happen after the other 29 are complete. Your coworker will return and tell you the panel is a coffee machine. Push the red button to get some coffee and the credits, unlocking this achievement.